Lilacs & Greensleeves: Forever Love

Now not all couples go through life having major squabbles like that but even those who do seem to really love one another, even through the complaints. Just in the time I have been with Care4You, I’ve had the absolute pleasure of meeting senior couples who not only showed ‘Forever Love’ to one another when I first meet them but that love was sustained the whole time I was ever in their presence. They walked the talk and what a beautiful example they were and are! Did they disagree? Certainly! Did they roll their eyes when one said something that made the other one scoff? Sure!! But there was never a time when either one showed the other any disrespect and as caregivers, once our clients become very comfortable with us being there, true colors come shining through and I can honestly say that it’s so refreshing to see couples being themselves….laughing, fussing, discussing the children, just normal home life. To me, it’s an encouraging sight and I take a deep breath and close my eyes and remember one beautiful evening, when caregiving for my parents was done for the moment and I walked into our living room to see my husband, yes, channel surfing the television. I was tired….very tired and as I sat down on the sofa, with him in his recliner, he came across a program where a young woman appeared on stage to sing one of the most beautiful songs I have ever heard, ‘Because You Loved Me!’
As I sat there mesmerized not only with her gorgeous voice, the words, oh those words just filled my soul! When she was done, I turned towards my husband to remark how beautifully she sounded and there he was….my dear 6 foot 4 inch, football linebacker built man had major tears streaming down his cheeks and as I looked at him, I said, “What?” He pointed at me and exclaimed in a very strong voice through those tears, “That’s what I think about you…those words Deb, that’s what I feel about you!!!” Oh my…he took my breath away!! I never had anyone in my life declare a song for me and mean it with such love!! And then within a very short time from that joyful moment, my dear sweet husband’s own breath was suddenly taken away one evening when massive blood clots filled his lungs and as I held him in my arms trying my best to help him while waiting for rescue to arrive, my very best friend in this world was gone. Did we squabble through the years…oh yes! Did we have deep personal talks about everything from the meaning of life, the news in the world, our families, our faith, our caregiving? You betcha!! We were living ‘life!’ We had our ups and our downs, our laughter and our tears, we celebrated weddings of friends and family, we suffered in the losses of those we loved and all in all, even in the most difficult times….leaving each other was never on our minds. We had dreams going into our marriage and while sometimes that road we were on took a surprise turn and those dreams were not met, new ones took over and we forged ahead. And every time I hear Celine Dion sing that beautiful song, ‘Because You Loved Me,’ my heart just swells with the knowledge that we might not have made the golden 50 together…gee, we didn’t even make 30 years together but like so many of those before us and those after us, we were truly in love! What kind of love? The kind of love that we see in our clients at Care4You.The kind of love that makes us as caregivers smile in appreciation of the reality of two who are or have walked together through all kinds of circumstances. The kind of love that transcends even death… A ‘Forever Love.’